How I care for my daughter’s natural hair

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Time for a trim! Which I do as often as she needs them.

My daughter Janelle is 8 years old, and she has some beautiful, long and healthy natural hair. But her hair hasn’t always been this long or this healthy because when I was in the world I didn’t know how to care for my own hair let alone hers! So anyway, I want to share what I’ve been doing just in case any of you are also on this healthy hair (and hair growth) journey.

1. I wash and deep condition her hair weekly

Every Sunday, I wash her hair and deep condition it with a hydrating hair mask. And after I’m done I dry it with an old maxi skirt (or t shirt). I do not use dry off towels, and I finger detangle her hair while I’m applying the deep conditioner.

2. Moisturizers and protective styling

Either every morning or every night before bed (depending on how her hair looks and feels) I apply a moisturizer and an oil to seal her hair. We both use the Mielle Organics Avocado hair milk as well as some regular avocado oil from the grocery store. This is a must! Because dry and frizzy hair is a recipe for breakage.

The next thing I do is also very important. I believe that protective styles and deep conditioning is what has done the most for her strands (meaning restoring them and retaining their length). So I keep her hair protected in loose buns, which she loves just as much as she enjoys wearing her hair down.

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3. I model godly femininity before her

Now ya’ll know me (if you follow my blog!), everything we do needs to be done to the glory of God. Raising godly daughters in this perverted and superficial world can be very challenging, especially when we have struggles and insecurities of our own. So I teach my daughter (from the bible and by being) that beauty as we know it is not of God (It’s seduction and deception!). I teach her that true femininity is about being modest (godly) and helpful (not hindering or competitive!). Now of course, she still wants to put on a floral dress and do something cute to her hair (we all do!) and there’s nothing wrong with that as long as it doesn’t become an obsession or our identity is found in all of that. Also, I make sure that I’m kind to myself, and that I compliment other women and their unique features (like freckles etc.) in front of her. That way she can learn to embrace the diversity which in return (or subconsciously) will encourage her to love and to embrace herself.

So yeah, I hope that these things help you on your journey. May God bless you and all of your beautiful daughters ūüôā

Much love, Brandi

‚ô•‚ô•By the way, here’s some more¬†natural beauty tips for Christian women¬†

My Breastfeeding tips for first time nursing mothers

Being a mother definitely marks a new chapter in a woman’s life no matter how many times she may find herself with child. And for me, this time around has been very different because it is my first time breastfeeding.

I have been exclusively breastfeeding our baby girl Lauren for the past 10 months and have been wanting to give other first time nursing mothers a “head’s up”.¬† So keep in mind that this is just information on how to get started.¬† If you would like me to share more things on breastfeeding like how I pump or¬† increase (and decrease!) my milk supply, my nursing diet etc. then just let me know and I’ll make additional parts to this post. But in the meantime let’s get started!

Now the first thing that I would recommend for those of you who are new to breastfeeding is Google. Yes, do your research and get familiar with breasts.

I read COUNTLESS books and articles while I was pregnant. I even watched (way too many!) youtube videos. Some of them were of animals! Now of course you don’t have to be that extreme but I would definitely encourage you to research the process and to examine yourself. The more comfortable (and knowledgeable) you are with your breasts the easier it will be learning how to breastfeed, especially from other people.

And speaking of other people,
Read blogs and talk to other women with experience.

Don’t get me wrong, “professional” opinions are okay but you want to get advice from people who are actually experiencing (or have experienced) what you will be. No shade but I prefer someone who could offer me a little more than book reports and word of mouth. But to each her own. If you are the type to get peace of mind from consulting with professionals, just make sure you’re getting help from EXPERIENCED doctors or nurses who are (or at least want to be!) mothers. And if¬†you have friends or family members who have breastfed then that’s even better. I didn’t have anyone so I asked to have a lactation consultant come and talk to me during our stay at the hospital. She was very helpful. She helped me get through the first couple of days because the nurses were making my experience VERY stressful. Which leads me into the next tip..

Relax and get to know your OWN baby. Always remember that everything isn’t for everybody.

Like I mentioned before, researching is a good thing but setting laws and standards isn’t. Allow yourself time to grow. Especially at the hospital. Your baby is not only new to breastfeeding but to BREATHING in general. Be patient and gentle. Don’t let anyone, not even the doctors ruin¬† your experience.¬† For what it’s worth, a lot of the videos I watched on latching were useless. At least for me and my baby.¬† And that’s the thing, you’ll learn what works best for you and your baby. Each and every family is different so don’t take everything to heart.

And speaking of the heart, Guard it!

We live in a very perverted generation where women think there’s strength in being masculine. Embrace your true femininity. There is nothing more beautiful than a submissive wife and selfless mother. You have to be encouraged because the majority of women will have that “I don’t know how you do it” attitude. Especially selfish mothers or women without children! Don’t be afraid to stand your ground. Even if that means telling your husband that you don’t want any visitors until you guys figure some things out.

Get a manual breast pump

This will be your best friend. Especially if you have a fast let down or an over supply of milk like I did.¬†Trust me,¬† get one while you’re pregnant and bring it to the hospital with you. And while you’re at it,¬† grab a few nipple shields too!

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The Lactation consultant at the hospital gave me this manual breast pump and some nipple shields. To this day, I have only used this pump. She doesn’t know how much of a blessing she has been!

Don’t buy into the hype

Now I have to throw this out there because there is nothing wrong with formula feeding! I didn’t breastfeed any of my older children and you wouldn’t know the difference (as far as development goes). Going forward my husband and I just decided to breastfeed because it’s natural and I am embracing godly femininity. Yes, I know that the food industry isn’t trust worthy but what I’m saying is, is just feed the baby.¬† Don’t let pride and/or idolatry creep up in it.

And last but not least, don’t give up! Just pray.

I’ve noticed that a lot of the things I learned in the beginning were not even applicable until I was about 3 or 4 months in. That’s why we’re repeatedly told not to give up. Especially not within the first 3 months. It really does get easier. I wanted to give up SO many times. So ultimately, my advice to you would be not to give up when it gets tough, just PRAY! That is what has helped me the most.¬† At the end of the day, no one can help you more with this than God. And not only because He’s GOD but because breastfeeding was all His idea!! He strategically designed our bodies to give (and to receive) His provision. So ask Him to help you and your baby do all that He had originally intended.

So yeah,  I hope that this post helps! And I would love to hear all about your breastfeeding experiences or aspirations!

Group hug!!

Brandi

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Me nursing Lauren‚̧